Neo vs Luke Skywalker
Neo vs Luke Skywalker is the forty-second battle of Epic Rap Battles of Heroes and Villains, and the seventeenth battle of Season 3. It features the one chosen to rebel against the Matrix, Neo, against the Jedi to destroy the Death Star, Luke Skywalker. It was published February 1, 2017. Cast Zach Sherwin as Neo Chali 2na as Morpheus EpicLLOYD as Luke Skywalker Lyrics lines appear in lime green, Morpheus' in dark green, and Luke Skywalker's in sand.* 'Neo:' It’s time to stop reclining on your island, face the rhymes that I’m designing Who needs lasers? A couple command prompts on the Death Star and I’m in, Fixating on my target, let’s see, what’s happening on Tattooine? I’ll blast your ass and light up your planet with a can of gasoline Do you really need billions of dollars and films to tell such a simple story? When you spent your entire OT like one long episode of Maury? The “Chosen One” from your movies, but you’re missing in most of them, Who’s stealing the Sky’s thunder? Leave you like your home; I’m roasting ‘em The son became a farmer while the daughter became a princess? Life screwed you over, buddy, and I’m not talking about the incest There’s no Resistance; I’ll be thrashing you worse than your lightsaber can Proceed with gunning down your Uncle Ben like the beginning of Spider-Man A long time ago, this star started shit with his father’s cosmic apartheid Look on the bright side, at least you never went to the dark side Try to have a go at me and I’ll drop you in the pit below me You got good bars? What do you say, Morpheus? Show me. 'Luke Skywalker:' Quit those lines you’re manufacturing, with that group of Lost Boys you’re gathering I don’t have to answer to no one; I’m certainly not pandering to Mr. Anderson Let me get this straight: you’re a hopped-up hacker turned hero? Using computers to do your dirty work? What, you wanna go with ones and zeros? Who you trying to mess with, dude? You couldn’t bend a spoon! While I can use the force and send your trench coat ass directly to the moon! Your arsenal’s full of artificial firearms and kung fu galore? (Heh.) Trust me, man, this isn’t the fight you’re looking for Your most memorable scene is playing limbo under bullets? Your whole life was a lie, while I live mine to the fullest Put you in the hot seat as I go kapow with the Wachowskis Reborn in that goo with a shaved head, calling yourself Neo Nazi. You take the red pill, the battle’s over; the blue pill, you get a hard dick. Bust a move and I’ll light the fuse on this baby-faced John Wick You should know that you’re not untraceable just by going incognito, With moves like that, you think you have a chance? Wake up, Neo. 'Neo:' What if I told you: being overrated doesn’t make you unstoppable You’ve already lost; stop whining like, “No, that’s impossible!” You say my life was a lie, but you’re only known for learning the truth You could never outlast Anakin; he was even better than you in his youth So start snuggling up for warmth in the corpse of that Tauntaun ‘Cause your family’s evil and all of your friends are long gone And take that midget on your back and make a break for an escape shuttle Disappointing… my opponent and his sister make such a cute couple. 'Luke Skywalker:' And with this rebuttal, it’s the Return of the Jedi Me? The Sky’s flying high with Sci-Fi. You’re more like Humans Need Not Apply. A midget on my back? How about your Sam Jackson knock-off, Thomas? My dad would’ve slashed his ass and send him back to the Apocalypse! Religious symbolism? Are you really in that much need of a God? I lost my arm for this war; you fight by sleeping on the job! You got dropped when you couldn’t make anymore good movies While I’m on the top, the only thing you inspire’s school shootings! 'Neo:' You see rows of code, but I see this ending bad for you Though, I gotta Han it to you, it won’t be as bad as putting up with your nephew Oh wait, you never did. You went missing and everything went to shit, Now it’s up to The Last Jedi and I’m putting an end to this. 'Luke Skywalker:' Would you stop bugging out like that thing planted in your chest? I’ll take a page from Vader; thwart my enemy and kill the rest. I’m a Jedi Master; split the Sith and put an end to the radical So take your ass kicking and dive back down that rabbit hole. Category:Epic Rap Battles of Heroes and Villains Category:Season 3 Category:Neo vs Luke Skywalker Category:TKandMit